James and Anna's story
James and Anna created their family by adopting three children who are not related. They started by adopting Jack when he was 16 months old, followed by Tom when he was 22 months old and finally Amy when she was 5 months old. They had to wait at least two years between each child coming to live with them before they could apply to adopt again. The children are now aged 12, 10 and 5.
Adoption is an open discussion in their family. The children are at ease with showing their life story book and discussing their birth families who remain very important to them. Two of their children are still in contact with their birth families and exchange letters, which can be tricky for the third child as he does not have contact. James and Anna actually met Tom’s birth mother during the initial early period of his move to their family, but there is no direct contact as part of his adoption plan. Anna is clear on how important it is to be honest with their adopted children about their stories and about any changes in their birth families as they will worry and think about them.
James and Anna have found that it’s important to give their children lots of opportunities for development, from sport to other clubs and activities. They have also made sure that the children have a good predictable routine so as they have a continuing sense of security and predictability in their lives, as this was not their past experience. James and Anna hope that if and when their children are ready, they would like to support them in finding out more about their birth family and possibly meeting them.
If anyone is thinking about adopting, James and Anna would advise them to ‘go for it’! They have no regrets. They love their children dearly but recognise the importance of professional support and the support of family and friends, both on a practical level but emotionally as well.
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